What Have I Been Up To Lately? (May 2018)

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It's time for a chat!
I feel as though it's been a while since I wrote a chatty post, so here goes! I've got a lot to say and I while I want to avoid oversharing, I want to make this kind of post a regular thing.

First off, I can't believe how fast the year is going! It feels like the start of the year was only yesterday and since then, I've kept myself very busy - as always!

Over the past couple of months, I've gradually taken a step back and started listening to my inner voice. I reached a point where I was sick and tired of people telling me what to do, casting aspersions, projecting their BS onto me and giving me poor, patronising and unsolicited advice. I felt as though I was being pressured, pushed and pulled in a number of different directions. I felt overly anxious and overwhelmed and a couple of months ago, I decided that enough was enough.

I stopped listening to people - not in a rude way - and started listening to what I wanted. I put an end to things that were bringing me down and not benefiting me in any way. I stopped forcing myself to do things that were not right for me, and I was willing to put my foot down and establish my boundaries against forceful people. I started to come up with my own solutions and strategies because I'm a smart woman and I know what's best for me. Why wouldn't I listen to myself over people who seem to think it's okay to scold and belittle me?

It's one thing to receive help to achieve goals, be accountable and change my life for the better. It's another thing to be pushed into achieving a 'goal' that is unrealistic and detrimental to my well-being. In some ways, my life is difficult and stressful at the moment, but I refuse to jump from the frying pan and into the fire. I'm not going to take myself from one stressful situation to another.

I will take my time and figure things out and do things my way because no one knows me better than I know myself. I'd rather go at my own pace and be the creator of my own journey, instead of being scrutinised, criticised and judged for not following someone else's journey. I'm so sick and tired of being made to feel as though I'm not trying hard enough to change my life for the better. My path is unique to me and there's nothing wrong with that. I don't want to fit into someone else's cookie cutter expectations and I'll never be able to do so.

Nowadays, I spend a lot of time on my own, partly because I work on my own and partly because I'm an introvert with zero tolerance for dead-weights, toxic people and time wasters. After spending my entire life being constantly surrounded by people who do nothing but bully me, project their insecurities onto me, show a total lack of respect and appreciation for me, treat me as though I don't exist (or as if my existence is a threat) and put me down, I've had enough. I've decided that unless I'm spending time with positive people who lift up my spirits, I'd rather spend time on my own. Life is too short to deal with trashy and narcissistic people who devalue and dehumanise me. I'd rather keep my distance and keep it moving. In the past, I used to waste time with people who were spiteful towards me but now I don't do that anymore because it's detrimental to my well-being.

I just want to be able to live a normal life and do normal things (whatever that means) but I can't do that if I'm scrutinised and judged for every single thing I do. That's why I choose to spend most of my time alone, which is kind of liberating to be honest.

Currently, I'm looking to start afresh and establish a new life elsewhere. I want a better life for myself so I'm currently looking for a new home and lucrative opportunities. Watch this space.

In the meantime, freelance writing has been keeping me very busy. My income is still unstable, I still don't earn enough to actually make a living and I've had moments of self-doubt and feeling like an impostor. But, I'm glad I still chose this path and I have complete faith that everything will work out in the end. I've been working on a lot of beauty writing projects and I've been writing different types of copy. I recently redid my business website - which you can check out here - and even though that's up and running and I've gained a bit of interest through the site, I've gained most of my beauty writing opportunities via Upwork. Now, I know a lot of people say "don't use Upwork! It's a race to the bottom," and that's true to some degree, but it's a great way to find clients if you use it strategically.

Staying on the topic of freelance writing, I wrote for the latest issue of Blogging Breakthrough Magazine! You can read that here. I'm also going to start writing for three online publications so watch this space. :) I was meant to start writing for an online skincare directory and I thought I'd been accepted to come on board but that fell through. That's left me feeling disappointed but onwards and upwards.


As I am self-employed, I'm required to file a self-assessment tax return (booooo!) But there's good news - I filed my tax return at the beginning of this month and I feel so relieved. Before the previous tax year was over I had my documents ready and I promised myself that I would file as soon as possible. Honestly, I don't understand people who wait until January of the next year. Why wait? File and get it over and done with.


As for personal development, I started getting back into fitness. I can't afford a gym membership right now, so I've been completing sessions at home. The Popsugar Fitness YouTube channel has a lot of workout videos and I've been following those in order to get fit. I also started learning Spanish using the Duolingo and Babbel Spanish apps.



BIG NEWS!

I passed my theory test last week! 


I'm so happy! It's been challenging but now it's over and I'm so glad. The next step is for me to start taking practical driving lessons and then take my practical test. I'm currently researching driving schools so if you know of any good ones (in the South-West London area) then please let me know.


Things I'm looking forward to
- I need to start my copywriting course. I signed up for it a couple of months ago but I've not been able to get started. Luckily, I can start the course at any time and now that I'm not revising for my theory test anymore, I can now get focused on becoming a qualified and certified professional copywriter.
- I'm looking forward to watching Love Island! Can the show just please return to our TV screens already?! I can't wait any longer.
- I'm looking forward to watching Prince Harry and Meghan Markle's wedding. I'm very excited for this occasion. I'll be there - in my living room watching it on the telly.


What have you been up to lately? Let me know in the comments below.

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