A Sensitive Topic And A Chance For Justice

Tuesday, August 15, 2017


As a blogger, I always aim to use my platform wisely, and that means writing about sensitive subjects from time to time.
This doesn't mean that I'll always open up about my personal experiences, but I'll always try my best to bring awareness to a topic and give information that might help anyone reading my posts.


Today I want to bring awareness to a sensitive topic and a chance for justice for those who have experienced traumatic times and are victims of crime.

This is a subject that is close to my heart because I have had some very traumatic experiences. I won't go into details about this, but I'll explain it in the simplest way: I had a horrible childhood and it affects me to this day, and the things I went through as a child caused me to struggle to form solid, healthy and long-lasting social bonds with others.

Don't get me wrong, I do have wonderful friends in my life right now and I always aim to surround myself with people who influence me in a positive way. But sometimes I find it so hard to relate to others and I perceive situations in a certain way. I can get overly anxious, depressed and defensive sometimes because I can't help but feel as though the world is "against me" in some way. I sometimes find it hard to be confident and assertive, and I went into therapy years ago for crippling low self-esteem because it was destroying my life and people kept on using me, hurting me and taking advantage of me.

Plus, I feel extremely bitter and resentful: I am a wonderful person with a kind heart yet I've been messed about time and time again and I really struggle with this because I know I don't (and didn't) deserve to be treated like crap by so many people. I treat others how I'd like to be treated - with respect, kindness and care - but quite often, I don't receive those things in return, and that's awful.

One thing that still troubles me about my childhood experiences is the fact that I went through a lot of injustice. Most people didn't take me seriously. Most people didn't help or support me - I was constantly gas-lighted or scapegoated. Most people refused to get involved. Most people promised to help me but they ended up letting me down. Some people even tried to punish me for my problems! But to be honest, that was always a part of the issue - I always felt as though I was punished for being a child, punished for being myself and penalised for standing up for myself and speaking up. There are a lot of unresolved issues and strong feelings of unresolved hurt, and that's why I struggle sometimes because I feel so let down and short-changed. I feel as though I was cheated out of a good childhood and I feel sad because I'll never be able to have the childhood I always wanted.

However, for those of you who have been in my situation, there is hope. CICA UK aims to help victims of abusive crimes to gain compensation from the government CICA scheme. If you have been physically or mentally injured you can apply to the CICA for compensation ranging from £1,000 to £500,000. Some people might find the idea of claiming compensation to be extremely daunting and scary. However, CICA UK will support you and will work hard on your behalf to help you claim the compensation you need and deserve, meaning that you can focus on other aspects of your life and try to move on from your ordeal.

Some people might find the idea of claiming compensation to be extremely daunting and scary. However, CICA will support you and will work hard on your behalf to help you claim the compensation you need and deserve, meaning that you can focus on other aspects of your life and try to move on from your ordeal.



No matter what, it's your choice and you have every right to decide on a path of resolution and recovery that suits you, whether that's applying for compensation, getting professional help or finding a support group. For myself, something that's helped me to cope is going through therapy, attending support groups, surrounding myself with positive people and practising self-care. Over time, I'm slowly learning to stop being so hard on myself. I can't change the past and I can't beat myself up about it. I was clearly failed and demonised but I didn't have any part in that. I now accept that the things that happened to me weren't my fault and I had no control over the situations I was put in. I can't (and will not) take any responsibility for my traumatic experiences. All I can do is take full responsibility and accountability for my actions and reactions, especially in the present moment.

I'm working extremely hard to rebuild my life and I'm glad I've achieved some big things in adulthood, such as graduating from university with a 2:1, starting my blog and becoming a self-employed copywriter. However, I'm still a 'work in progress' and it will take time. I'm in recovery mode and I'm still trying to figure things out, but I do know that time is great healer and I hope to find inner peace on day.

*This post was written in collaboration with CICA. However, all opinions are my own.

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3 comments

  1. I'm sorry about your childhood. I had a very difficult one and would describe it in the same language used in this post. Like you said, I too feel like I was cheated of a good childhood but I have vowed not to let it keep me down and I'm glad you aren't letting it either! I know we haven't met or know each other but I'm rooting for your success! You can do it girl!

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  2. Wow, glad that you mentioned it here, people who blog don't care much about what they are posting, these are basic ethics of blogging. Good post, thanks for sharing it

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