Embrace Yourself!

Monday, May 15, 2017


Learning to love myself is a journey that I've been on for quite some time. I'd like to say that I completely love myself, but that's not exactly true. While I do love myself to some degree, I still have moments where I have low self-esteem, or times where my confidence in myself has been completely shot down.


Something I may have mentioned on this blog and offline is that I have struggled with low self-esteem my entire life. The extent of this is so bad that I've had to have therapy for this (CBT, which didn't work for me at all.) My lack of self-esteem was so bad - it was impacting interpersonal relationships, I struggled to be assertive and there were so many times where, as a child, I couldn't look at myself in the mirror for a prolonged period of time without feeling tearful and despising myself.

But the reasons why my level of self-esteem was so low (and therefore debilitating) was because of other people and because of the traumatic circumstances I'd experienced in my life. No one is born with low-esteem after all - I certainly wasn't, but I was never encouraged to have high levels of self-esteem either.

Throughout my entire life, I've always been made to feel as though something is wrong with me. I've always been demonized and made to feel as though I'm a bad, evil and horrible person by default, and that I'm somehow the cause (or deserving) of other people's poor treatment of me. I've always been made to feel as though nothing I do is ever good enough and that no matter how hard I try, I'll always be a failure. I've always been made to feel as though my personality traits are 'flaws' that need 'fixing' or 'correcting' and I've had so many people attempt to mould me into something I'm not. I've often been punished and penalized for being myself, for not being perfect enough and for not fitting in and following the herd. I've had so many people disrespect, control, objectify, violate and manipulate me. I've had so many people target me, single me out, treat me as though I'm weak, cross my boundaries, disregard me and dehumanise me. I've often had my feelings, emotions, wants, needs, issues and desires completely dismissed and there have have so many times where I have been made to feel as though I don't matter, I'm not cared about and I simply don't exist or belong.

Basically, I've been treated so poorly simply because of who I am, because certain people in my life have made spiteful assumptions about my character, and because I'm the odd one out.

Well, now is the time to call total BS on all of that!

It's time to embrace myself.

I am who I am. There is nothing wrong with me and I am not a vile and evil person. Yes, I have wonderful personality traits and I have flaws, but those make me the human being that I am. I actually like who I am. I am kind-hearted with a sweet nature. I'm gradually living my life my way. I may not fit in with everyone else but that's okay - I'd rather be an individual and I'll never follow the herd. I deserve to be treated with respect, kindness and consideration and I do matter.

In life it is so important to embrace yourself and say "I like who I am and I accept myself." Once you have the power to embrace yourself, you have the chance to thrive, blossom and live a better quality of life.

I still have a long way to go, but I'm glad I have been able to stick to my guns, maintain my sense of integrity and stay true to who I am instead of giving into other people's expectations of me. Most of all, I'm glad that I can look at myself in the mirror and smile at myself instead of embarking upon phases of self-loathing.

By embracing myself, I've come to a place of self-acceptance and self-love, and that makes me feel happy and liberated. I don't need to seek validation and approval from others. As long as I love myself, then I'm good.

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2 comments

  1. I just want to give you a super big bear hug!!!
    You're an overcomer and you will continue to soar girl! This post resonates me so much! I am on the journey myself. One thing i'm working on is affirmative statements. Writing out thing i love about myself and reminding myself of those every other day.
    You're a beautiful person to me. You write so beautifully too! Sorry for the hard times growing up but i'm super glad that you're in a better place now and still growing!

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