5 Things I Will NOT Miss About University

Friday, August 28, 2015

Yesterday I wrote about the five things I will miss about university when I graduate, but today I am going to talk all the things I will not miss about university once I leave.

I have had my fair share of ups and downs at university, and even though I have enjoyed university I have had some really bad moments which at times have put a downer on my university experience.

So after much deliberation I have decided to talk about the five things I will not miss about university.

1. Rubbish flatmates/housemates
I haven't had any great luck with flatmates.  I have had some really poor experiences living with flatmates/housemates, and that's not been great at all.

Pretty much most of my flatmates/housemates have had some really bad traits.  They have been:

Lacking in common sense
Excuse merchants
Passive aggressive
Boundary violators

Living with rubbish flatmates and housemates has taught me is that most people are idiots and I'd be much better off living on my own - which is something I always wanted to do but I couldn't afford to do so.  At the end of the day bad flatmates/housemates are not worth the hassle or the trouble, especially for someone like me - all I care about is getting a good classification and a good degree.  I am a bit on an introvert anyway - I like my own space, I prefer my own company and I cannot cope with feeling trapped and miserable in the house/flat I live in.

There have been times where I was treated so badly, even times where I felt as though I was being victimized, harrased, bullied and demonized and that is such an unpleasant experience, and one that I will never miss.  I deserve to be happy.  I don't deserve to feel 'picked on' or targeted, and I shouldn't have to live with toxic drama.  I believe in the mantra "Home Sweet Home."  That's the way it should be, but unfortunately I have never had that experience in my life.

I am fed up of the bullshit - I want to live in a home and feel a sense of peace, and that is not too much to ask for.  I don't want to deal with aggressive behaviour.  I don't want to deal with bitchy people.  I don't want to be on the receiving end of nasty remarks.  I don't want to constantly argue with people.  I don't want to live in dirt and filth.  I want a 'home sweet home' that I can feel happy in for once in my life.

I think I need to live on my own.  Hopefully I will be able to do that in the future.

2. Rubbish friends
Even though I have met some great people at university - through my courses and societies - I haven't had much luck with making good friendships and that is quite unfortunate.

I used to hang out with a group of 'friends' and acquaintances, but then they started treating me in a poor way and talking to me in a disrespectful manner.

Without going into too much detail, a series of 'events' occurred in 2014 that made me realise that my so-called 'friends' were not my friends at all, in particular one 'friend' (more like an acquaintance) who I discovered was trying to use me for his own selfish reasons.  He was trying to put me down at every given opportunity, trying to violate my boundaries, treating me like an object, and was trying to create tension between myself and others.

The final straw came the day after my birthday when I discovered that my 'friends' and acquaintances were talking nonsense behind my back.  Enough was enough and I wasn't going to tolerate it (I have never tolerating of people who disrespect me anyway.)  Time and time again, I was constantly put down, made a mockery of, and spoken about as if I was nothing more than a silly little girl who didn't know anything and was not deserving of opinions.  Then I found out that certain comments about myself, my opinions, my choices, my beliefs, my decisions and my life were being spoken about behind my back, and not in a good way.

I'd had enough.  I didn't want to associate with these people anymore.  I didn't like them.  I didn't want to socialise with them anymore.  I like to socialise but the thought of socialising with them made me so miserable.  Anytime we'd hang around they'd always make snide and unkind remarks, try to fill my head with crap and try to impose their (ignorant and very stupid) opinions on me.

January 2015 arrived and I thought "I don't want these people in my life anymore."  For a long time I'd been thinking about walking away from the group anyway because I didn't want to keep going through the same old nonsense, so I decided to keep my distance.  I just stopped talking to them.  I started hanging around with people at society events, and I started having a lot of fun!

I have a couple of good friends that I still talk to though.  As for everyone else in the 'friendship' group, I couldn't care less because I don't have respect for those who don't have respect for me.  It's very important for me to have friends who treat me right, accept me for who I am, respect my decisions, encourage me and support me - not friends who want to see my fail and trip up at every given opportunity.

All in all, I'm not about the drama.  I never have been and I never will be.  I don't care for toxic people, immaturity, ignorance, high school behaviour and peer pressure, especially at university, and I refuse to be a part of any of it, especially when I am at the receiving end of it.

3. The clubbing 'mentality.'
I am not into the clubbing scene at all.  It does my head in. I always feel so uncomfortable when I'm in a club. What makes it worse is the constant pressure to be a part of it, and the nasty remarks I've received when I choose to opt out of it.

Nowadays I tend to keep my distance from people like that, and my friends from home don't go clubbing at all so that helps and they are like me so they are very understanding. I like to socialise but I am not the sort of person who wants to go out every night getting drunk, clubbing and sleeping around.  That type of lifestyle is not for someone like me. I'm a bit of an introvert anyway. I like to socialise but I like to come home at the end of the day and curl up on the sofa.

4. Assessments
I love my course, and I always knew that I would have to do loads of reading and assessments - which is fine - but I am kind of tired of the stress that comes with revising for exams and writing out essays, and I'm so done with stressing over my marks. I take my degree very seriously and I really want to get the right marks so I work extremely hard and put so much of an effort into my course, but I cannot wait to leave all the stress and anxiety of assessments behind.  To be honest, I am tired of it all.

5. Finances
Even though I have enjoyed being a full-time student at university, I want to start making money! I am so sick and tired of having to survive on the basic loan.  Before I came to university I worked so I was used to having payments added to my bank balance. I miss that so I cannot wait to go back into the world of work.

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  1. I can definitely relate to having rubbish flatmates. I had a party girl roommate my freshman year who was super messy and rude, then I lived with a couple girls who were acquaintances and the one was just inconsiderate, disrespectful, lazy, and VERY passive-aggressive. It makes being in your own home unbearable at times. Luckily, I'm living with a friend this year and hoping it goes better. So far we've made it 4 months with no problems, so I think we're off to a good start. I hope you're able to live on your own, drama free.

    - Courtney

    1. Yeah, I know what you mean, it's so horrible. In my first two years I lived with a group of girls and a couple of them were very horrible to me. Plus the flat/house was always messy. It's not nice because I shouldn't feel uneasy, unhappy and uncomfortable in my home yet I was made to feel that way. :(

      Then last year I moved out and moved into private accommodation and that flat was SO filthy. Most of my flatmates were so disgusting, they didn't make any effort to clean up after themselves and they were SO lazy, they would often make excuses for not cleaning and they would make really offensive comments in regards to the mess. For example, on of my flatmates would stay in all day and all night to watch TV yet she would NEVER make any effort to clean and she'd make silly excuses. It got to the point where I always stayed in my room because I hated the communal areas so much, it made me feel uncomfortable. I'd try to go in if no one else was in and I would only clean up after myself or clean up the areas I needed to use. I was also being harassed by a couple of guys and I didn't get on with them. Eventually I decided to switch flats, and I'm hoping that when I return to university for my final year in a few weeks my new flatmates will be much better.

      As for living alone, this is something I have always wanted to do. I want to be able to live in a stable, clean and quiet home where I can have my own space and not have to deal with other people's mess or drama. I am not a slave and I deserve to live clean and peacefully in my home so I would like to try to find a one-bed/studio flat for post-graduation.



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